So, Declan has been a terror again lately – tantrums, screaming, crying – the works.
I know part of it is he is on the verge of giving up his naps… some days he needs them, some days he does not… so I am sure that is causing some of his emotional rollercoaster.
I also know he is seeing things at school, behaviors that kids get away with, and he is trying them out at home. There is one kid in particular who is a pretty big disruption and Jenny and I both have come to realize when Lily or Declan are trying out the “_______ ________ Face” (insert little boy’s name who attends Declan’s school and is a holy terror all day long). Not that I blame the kid – his parents allow him to be horrible to them at every opportunity. It’s really sad, actually.
So, we have been trying everything from here to Sunday. This evening was pretty bad and both Bryan and I were fed up. I was in his room, doing his nightly routine (sing Edelweiss, ask him what he is going to dream about and recite a series of lovey dovies that only a Mom can string together)… and Declan asked for more puppies. I told him that Daddy has just brought him 3 new puppies, so the answer was no. HE LOST IT. Started screaming at me at an ear-piercing octive. I simply got up from the bed and walked out of the room.
He screamed for a while and then calmed down. I heard him pathetically calling my name and I went back in. I sat on his bad and we talked for quite a long time about why I didn’t appreciate how he spoke to me, what alternatives he had, and how I know he is nice person deep inside all that screaming.
Here is the crazy thing – despite the authoratative tone of the paragraph above – it really was a conversation rather than me giving a lecture. I felt like he got what I was trying to say (i.e. “just because other kids do it, that doesn’t mean you have to”)… and it was a glimpse of a more mature relationship between us.
I loved it.
Who knows if it will make a difference, but it sure felt good.