The Bathroom Post

Here is the post from Tuesday that I deemed too undignified to be posted on Obama Day. It’s probably too undignified to be posted any day, but eh. Who cares? It’s funny.

So. We canceled our cable two years ago for the sheer pleasure and money saving benefit of having enough cash on hand to have our house cleaned every two weeks.

The best thing I have ever done in my whole life.

Especially since our cable company never actually turned off the cable so we still get some cable channels through the TV. Yeah us!

But the other day, when our cleaning lady was here, she accidentally turned our heat up as she was dusting. To like 100. Like our house was a sauna when we got home.

What is significant about this?

Apparently, to Declan, the most significant thing was how warm the toilet seat was.

See, Declan has always been a constipated child. Since birth. So, generally trips to the bathroom for the expulsion of solids take a while. A long while.

The day of the freaky tropical rain forest heat in our house?

“Mama! I am so glad that Maria turned the heat up. Because THIS toilet seat is sooooooo snugly and sooooooo warm. Usually it is cold, but today, I loooooove it. And if this wasn’t a toilet with a big hole and filled with water, I would tooooootally go to sleep RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.”

I swear. He totally said that.

And yes, this post also makes me one of those terrible mommy bloggers who share too much, where Declan will be traumatized by what I wrote in about 10 years.

But again, eh. Who cares? It’s funny.

This article has 26 comments

  1. Melinda

    I fell asleep on the toilet once. It was in a public bathroom to boot. But I was pregnant at the time, so I figure that’s okay. ūüėČ Cute story, Aim! ūüôā

  2. zipper

    awesome.

  3. Meghann

    You know I had a similar conversation with Lindsay after we moved into this house. The toilets here have those cushy seats. She was so excited that they don’t get as cold as the hard ones, lol!

  4. ‚ô•georgie‚ô•

    LOL…that is funny and cute!

  5. Manisha

    Oh this is hilarious! Maybe you could use a space heater to heat the bathroom before each time that he needs to use it! Oh, what the heck, maybe I need to use a space heater before…

  6. Kristy - Where's My Damn Answer

    Too funny. Yesterday in the car Zac said something and said … “oh wait I shouldn’t have said that”. I asked why and he said, “I’m sure you’re going to blog about it.”

    Maybe … :: thinking ::

    … aren’t they there for our entertainment and writing pleasure?

  7. mothergoosemouse

    Oh, that won’t traumatize him later. All guys dig comfortable bathroom accommodations. His friends will nod along and say, “Dude, what a lucky day!”

  8. Ashleigh

    bawahahahaha!

    That is priceless.

  9. Doodaddy

    Do you suppose they sell heated toilet seats? If not, that’s *totally* our million dollar idea! And you’re an artist — you could design the ad campaign. Oh, the images running through my head…

  10. EatPlayLove

    Aah! Declan would love Japan, they have super fancy schmancy toliets there, with heated seats.

  11. monstergirlee

    It IS funny! And yes, I think he will be very unhappy should this surface when he’s 12. Or 13. etc.

  12. Grey Street Girl

    That’s hilarious! Maybe you should get him a seat warmer!

  13. Nadine

    LOL! We both have a bathroom post up today!

  14. g-man

    Too funny. Did it help him go? Our Princess Drama Queen has spouted off a couple funnies recently too. Maybe it is just that time of year? ūüôā

  15. Tree

    It’s really cute. As is Declan.

  16. Anonymous

    Dex is a trip!!!

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