By snooping, I mean look through your partner’s stuff without their knowledge, not some hip-hop jargon of which I probably have no idea of which I am speaking.
I was chatting with some girlfriends last night and one of them mentioned an article that she read on the Today Show blog. (Video embedded below).
The short version: Woman allegedly cheats on husband. Man allegedly looks at her email because he thinks wife is cheating. Wife allegedly says man allegedly “hacked” her computer and allegedly invaded her privacy. Husband allegedly says he thought kids were in danger from the lover, and allegedly the emails prove it. Lawyers allegedly say, if they convict him, ” we better build more courthouses, because there won’t be enough room for all the cases coming to trial.” Actually, that last part was not allegedly, because I saw the guy say it in the video.
According to the news report, the law was primarily meant for hackers going after financial gain, intellectual property or identity theft – not snooping spouses.
Now, I am no lawyer. Nor do I play on on the internet. So, again, I have NO IDEA what I am talking about. But I am kind of on the side of the dude. AS FAR AS GOING TO COURT.
Don’t we have more serious issues to deal with in this country than this?
But, AS FOR THE INITIAL SNOOPING? I am with the gal.
I just don’t get it.
Maybe I am lucky in that I have a trustworthy partner, or maybe it’s just not in my DNA, but the thought of logging into Bryan’s email seems so bizarre to me. Weird and icky. Like trying on his underwear. Or smelling it. Or smelling it and then trying it on. Which trust me, I never have done.
I know snoopers, though. Several of them, actually. And it seems like such a slippery slope. He looks and sees something. Wonders what it is, makes an assumption. She can’t believe he did that to her, so she is going to do it right back. And sees something else, out of context maybe, or maybe in context, who knows – point being – it’s not hers to see. And an insidious cycle of miscommunication starts.
It seems to me, that if you feel like you want to snoop, it might be better to step back, and have a conversation with your partner first. And work through that weird, icky feeling before you go looking at email.
Yes, I understand, in this case they were separated, and he says he had the kids at heart. And maybe that is different than a current relationship where you are working through current issues.
But I would still rather talk through my problems than go around smelling Bryan’s underwear.