Addiction

I have addicts all over the family, especially on my dad’s side. I have been lucky to escape it – but when the pull is so strong, you have to be careful. I’ve had to fight it. And I have won.

I don’t mean to sound all, “I am above addiction.” I mean I KNOW I could fall for it. Easily.

With all my health issues, I have been in a lot of pain this year. Trust me, I will never dismiss Declan when he complains of ear pain every again. It hurts – SO SO SO MUCH.

And when you are in a lot of pain, they give you a lot of pills.

My preference: Vicodin.

It just works, feels good, but doesn’t make me SO loopy I can’t function.

Therein lies the problem.

I have heard enough addicts talk about their drug of choice and how one is preferable over the other.

I can tell you with full certainty – I have to be careful about vicodin.

I got some more, and have really needed it, when they pulled my back tooth and crowned its neighbor last week. Apparently that back tooth had a huge root, and was twisting around, cracking the other tooth in the process.

Ouch.

So, yeah. Vicodin is in the house again – for probably the 5th time this year.

I held it up to Bryan and told him, “This is the drug you have to watch me with. This is the one that should NOT disappear quickly. This is NOT the one I need refills for. THIS is the one that would be my problem – I like it too much.”

I have been making it through the days without it, as much as possible. I try to lean on Advil, as much as possible. And hopefully in a few days I will be able to throw away the extras from the prescription, unused.

I have seen that place, I have seen where it takes you, and I don’t want to go there.

This article has 15 comments

  1. Amy --- Just A Titch

    I can really relate to this: I have a lot of alcoholic/drug abuse on my mom’s side of the family. I watch myself constantly for signs of it (i.e. using alcohol as a panacea, relying on substances, etc.). Vicodin was a tricky one for me, too.

    I hear you. Good for you for being aware.

  2. Rachel

    Amen. I totally hear you.

    I was thrilled to wake up Saturday morning not in pain after my own minor oral surgery Friday. Only three doses of the stuff needed. I’m a bit more removed from the major surgeries than you, but I was worried.

  3. zipper

    I have been lucky to avoid this.

  4. Amy Jo

    Good for you for putting this out there. So many people are afraid of addiction, and as someone who has lots of addicts in my family, too, I know how you feel approaching this. Hope your pain goes away quickly!

  5. Anonymous

    Sounds like you are just justifying.

  6. Sam

    Good on ya. I’m on Vicodin cough syrup right now, and it’s kind of fun. Which is why I need to watch it, as well.

    I will also say – instead of tossing them in the trash, see if there’s a hospital or clinic near you that will take them (and other expired/unused drugs) for disposal. Drugs shouldn’t be thrown away to leak into the water table, nor just flushed down the toilet. I don’t mean to PSAbomb your addiction post, but that did stick out for me.

    Now – Feel better, get healthy, and stay sober! 🙂 Ok, How about just “stay not addicted to anything”? 😉

  7. Sarah

    I’m pretty careful with the vicodin, too. For managing severe pain, I really like alternating ibuprofen & tylenol. I don’t really use tylenol any other time, but it’s amazing in conjunction. Every 4 hours, I take one or the other. I’ve used this post wisdom tooth removal, when I cracked a vertebrae, and even post back surgery for that cracked vertebrae. I think I took two doses of vicodin, then started on the ibuprofen/tylenol scheme. Don’t forget alternating heat & cold, too 🙂

  8. keli [at] kidnapped by suburbia

    I’m proud of you for posting this post. I’m proud of you for being honest. XO

  9. Eva

    I have a great deal of addiction in my family as well – drug, alcohol, food, you name it. I definitely think it’s a mentality I struggle with too. It gets so easy to numb the physical pain, but then numbing the mental pain becomes the focus. And, God that feels good. I think you’re right in acknowledging it’s out there, in setting up a great support system and in just not keeping the drugs around. A+ for you!

    I really hope you get to feeling better in 2012. Physical pain is so disruptive to life!

    (And, the healthcare compliance officer in me agrees with Sam. But, I don’t practice what I preach unfortunately.)

  10. Issas Crazy World

    It’s almost nice to hear this. Becuase this is me too. I come from a long line of addicts. Both sides. I got flack starting at 12 years old for not smoking. 12. I don’t do any of it. I rarely drink. Nothing. Because I know.

    Yet, after a shoulder surgery, I found that I liked the Vicoden. I was neurotically careful with it. But I was on it for months. It was when I really understood, how strong that pull in someone can be.

  11. Becky

    Your honesty is awesome and SO refreshing.

    Good for you for being so tuned into yourself.

  12. WILLIAM

    I take a medication for disk neck issues. I tell the doctor not to give me refills unless I see him.

  13. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Thanks for all the support, everyone.

  14. Svillagedoctor

    Yes you may take Vicodin for neck and back pain. You must assess your pain level between 1 and 10 if it is severe Vicodin is often recommended. I am a doctor and have had 4 major back surgeries and take Vicodin on a daily basis. You must discuss this with your physician so you can get a prescription and he or she may also want to check your liver function through a blood test because there is a lot of Tylenol in the product which may adversely affect your liver. You may have to be careful driving, drinking is not recommended. You can become addicted or the relief may lessen the more often you take it or over a prolonged period of time. Vicodin is useful but there are other products as well which don’t have some of the side effects.

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