It’s a weird thing, getting older. At first, mainly you just can’t believe it. Where did that come from? I feel exactly the same as I did ten years ago! Well, except my kid was unable to feed himself then and now he pretty much could move out and have his own apartment, but whatever.
I recognize that, in a lot of ways, I am lucky… because I do look younger than my age of 43.
I also recognize that I’m starting to get obnoxious about it. The other night, when I was out at a concert, my age came up in conversation; a very young and beautiful lady couldn’t believe it. When you’re 43 and a very young and beautiful lady says something like, “you look younger than me!” … you pretty much start doing a happy dance right there and suppress the urge to tongue kiss her with joy.
It’s even more weird when you look kinda young and shit gets real. I’m pretty sure I’m starting menopause. Either that or I’ve had a low-level virus for about a month. A low-level virus that makes your hair fall out and gives you hot flashes. Still kind of holding out for the virus, but like I said, I’m pretty sure I am starting menopause.
So when you are young-looking 43-year-old who goes to concerts with 20-somethings, imagine the anxiety threat level that losing your hair brings. Not that this wouldn’t be a anxiety-causing event for any woman for any reason… it just feels like the biggest part of getting older thus far.
I’ve always struggled with my weight (let’s not go there right now) and I continue to struggle with my skin. One of the reasons why my face looks so young is because I’ve basically had it completely scraped down to the bone multiple times by my dermatologist to get rid of acne.
But my hair? While fairly thin, there’s always been lots of it. Lots and lots and lots of it. Like so much they always had to thin it out to make it do anything fashionable. Never had to really worry about it. It’s looked decent unless I had a bad haircut. Or a bad hair day. But staring into that hairline and seeing way less way is way more scary than crows stamping their feet in the edges of my eyes. I’m starting to understand why so many women my age pay so much money to hold on to youth.
It seems like it’s too early.
I’m just as shocked as that very young and beautiful lady I met in the bar the other night.
Next menopause post: THE RAGE.