Back From BlogHer and I Feel Weird

I am being incredibly unfair with this post, because I didn’t actually attend BlogHer. I was there, in San Diego, with my family, doing family vacation things during the day, and attending BlogHer parties via the party pass at night. So, I know I did not get the real BlogHer experience.

But basically, I felt old. And weird.

Although, at 41, I should start getting used to feeling old… but it was more like I am Brenda and Kelly and Donna and there is a whole new 90210 show coming on. And they don’t know me and I don’t know them, and I am sure I will like them, but it just seems too much, too overwhelming – and dare I repeat it? – I am old, and weird.

I know part of the issue is how big BlogHer has become, which is AWESOME. Seriously. How exciting is it that a conference celebrating women’s blogs had over 3,500 attendees???

So I do not mean to be all sour grapes.

I just feel weird.

And wish I had met more new people.

Although I loved hugging my fellow Brendas, Kellys and Donnas.

How about you?

Were you in San Diego?

How was BlogHer for you?

Who are these people?!?

P.S. When I was searching for info on new and old 90201, everything linked to the new. Even within Jennie Garth’s bio. Is there some conspiracy to make me feel WEIRDER?

This article has 23 comments

  1. Amanda

    I wasn’t there, so there’s that.

    I can appreciate what you are saying and what I think we all need to remember ids that it was never going to stay the same. We aren’t who we were when we started, nor are our realities.

    I am excited for a new crop of bloggers, but more than that, I am moved by the evolving path of those of us who came before.

    Our stories are vibrant and the words we choose and perspectives we adopt are born from our experience and so different form what a new generation of bloggers will choose. It’s beautiful.

    We’re beautiful.

  2. Aliza

    I’m Donna. Weird, geeky, and I’d throw in lonely. I’ve started blog posts after some of the conferences Ive attended this year talking about how lonely and left out I often feel. But have yet to post one. I’m not part of any clique and am even older than you so often feel like an outsider. Next conference, we should hang, sister!

  3. Colleen - Mommy Always Wins

    In past years I really stuck with the folks I knew and only extended myself to meet other people knowing I had my peeps as backup. This year was different – I really spent some time on my own attending sessions that matter to *me* and met some people (REALLY met them – not just shook their hands and swapped cards). I feel old in that I am just DRAGGING today after all the parties and what not but I feel like I really made an effort this year to get outside my comfort zone!

  4. Sizzle

    I didn’t attend this year. At first it was because I am already going to CA on a different trip this week and could not afford 2 trips in one month. But then it became more about how I, if I had attended, would not have paid for the full conference pass and would only have attended the parties. And I wondered if I would feel left out, if it had gotten too big, if its focus is no longer my focus. I loved going back in the day but now it’s been 3 years since I went. I won’t be going next year either because it’s in NY (which kind of makes me feel sad).

    And yes, there IS a conspiracy to make us feel weirder. And by that I mean older.

  5. Meghann

    Didn’t go, never have. A few years ago, I was like “I can’t wait to get to go to BlogHer someday!” Now I’m like “meh.”

    I think I’d rather do one of the smaller conferences, like Blissdom or Evo. Although I don’t know if even those would be too much for me. Hmmm.

    I vote that it’s time for a November ’02 conference. Just sayin’. 😛

  6. Sara (from Saving for Someday)

    So I add to that weird feeling because I didn’t recognize you b/c I had my ‘far away’ glasses on and you were up close. I didn’t hear you because the music and crowd is so loud that even though you had to yell who you were I can barely hear you. I can’t see you since it’s dark and my eyes are so tired I can’t see well anyway.

    I ended up coming off as jerk-ish when it’s more like I was somewhere I didn’t fit in.

    If we could all just be who we really are and not something we think others want, there’d be fewer of us who think we don’t fit in.


    P.S. When I did finally see you, you looked so happy. Happy and beautiful from the inside!

  7. leaca

    I have never been. I should really think about going just for fun. It would be nice to meet some of my favorite bloggers. I am sure it would be very inspirational as well. I am going to have to look at going next year.

  8. Anonymous

    It was just the bigness of it I am sure. – m

  9. Kiran @

    I had to skip this year – but the reason I would have chosen to go is to meet bloggers and readers that I’ve had the pleasure of conversing online. It’s about time to meet face to face 🙂

  10. Anonymous

    You DO sound like sour grapes. There is plenty of room for everyone. Get over it.

  11. Susan Wells

    It was so good to see you if only for a few seconds. I was feeling old & tired & went back to my room to crash instead of back into the party. The friends that I spent the most time with were all around my age, but I do get what you are saying. The majority of women I met were younger and were attending their first BlogHer. BlogHer is a lot of fun but I’m thinking I will skip a year and try out a few new conferences.

  12. Susan

    Oops. Didn’t mean to leave that on the work account. It was great to see you!

  13. Rhiannon

    I was there and had a very lovely time, however it’s a TOTALLY different experience without booze.

  14. Eva

    I didn’t go, but I totally get what you’re saying. I’m excited about Blissdom (especially since I’m in Nashville). I am just going to lie to everyone and say I’m 25 though. By the time I get there I’ll be 40, but don’t tell anyone, okay?

  15. Mixtape Jones

    I feel weird that I want to go so badly and I’m a dude. But I mostly just want to go because there seem to be so many folks I’ve met that go. I think #SXSWi is probably more the way to go, but still…major FOMO. Plus, I think all these media conferences should totally book Dr. Pants to play. 😉

  16. FireMom

    You were on my list to hunt down and I missed you.

    I had a good time, but I don’t really party like some others. I had a few drinks, but I tend to sit in hallways and talk outside of party rooms. Or go out for dinner. Or be-bop around. Or spend time with my husband that I took with me for such a purpose. I’m an old soul myself.

    Just remind yourself that you don’t have to be the same as everyone else — on your blog or in person.

    As for the TOTAL sour grapes comment that told you to get over it, ignore the assholery whether in comments or in person. I had my annual one exchange with someone that didn’t really want to be speaking to me because I’m nobody special, but I decided to let it go.

    I had the best time I’ve had at a conference thus far this year. But it’s because I managed to let go of my anxiety and enjoy myself. And step outside of my comfort zone a bit as I’ve been trying to do all year. I was greatly rewarded with some awesome exchanges (and I don’t mean with brands). I’m excited to see what the small feel of BlogHer Writers ’11 will be like this October in NYC.

    I’m rambly. But I just want you to know that whether you’re Old Brenda or not, I admire you.

  17. Megan

    Aww, just roll with the punches honey! You’ll meet more next time.

  18. Kristen {RAGE against the MINIVAN}

    I had no idea you felt like this! You are the bomb. Hot – not old, and from my vantage we partied like rock stars. 🙂

  19. mayberry

    I felt the need to stick very close to my Conference Buddies, so I didn’t meet too many new people. Maybe because it was so big and overwhelming?

  20. Kelly

    Yeah, well, old and “weird” is the new “quirky”. lol That’s MY motto.
    We’re just more experienced..
    I’ve never been, and tho I have a blog, I don’t really consider myself a blogger..
    I did see the Pioneer Woman mention (on twitter) that she met you. That’s got to be a highlight!
    Think SHE feels old and weird?? nahhh
    Looks like you had a great time in San Diego, as did I last month on my vacation. Wish I were back in that weather. 🙂

  21. Brittany


    But, I’m Donna. I even refused to lose my virginity until she did.

  22. Magpie

    it was big and overwhelming and hard to process.

  23. Average Jane

    I was there, but I was very much taking it easy and thus didn’t make it to any parties until Saturday evening.

    And even though I was really pacing myself, I’m still tired a week later and have only written one post about one tiny aspect of the conference.

    So yes, I feel kind of old.

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