I will, I will… ROCK YOU.

Today, I entered a completely new arena for me. My first solo attempt at chaperoning a school field trip. We went to the Denver Children’s Museum, and may I say: I DID COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY AWESOME!?!?

And it wasn’t looking too good from the beginning. Declan’s teacher asked him to choose 3 kids from his class who would be his “buddies” for the day. Or more precisely – would be the kids I had to take care of for the day. Of course he chose Lily (whew) and then he chose two other friends who I didn’t know very well. One of whom is supposedly the complete bad-ass of the entire pre-K class.

Guess which one.

When Declan chose him – the kid got a 10 minute lecture from the teacher in front of everyone on why, how and when he needed to listen to me. I was completely shitting my pants.

But here’s the thing. Fifteen minutes with my son is enough to turn any child – no matter how much they misbehave normally – into the biggest dork who ever walked the face of the earth.


(In case you are wondering, they are wearing worm costumes.)

I should rent Declan out to teen shelters. “Are your kids in trouble with gangs and drugs? Spending time with Declan will increase your child’s nerd quotient dramatically… and possibly, maybe, even make them gay!”

Seriously though… the “bad” kid was awesome. I don’t know if it was my “newness,” or he was just having too much fun to misbehave, or the teacher’s lecture sunk in – or what… But he only flirted with getting out of hand one time and then I simply got down to his level and quietly spoke to him about calming down. I had to ask him to look at me a few times as we were talking, so I don’t know what goes on at home (and frankly I don’t really want to think about it)… and also you should have seen the look on his face when I kept complimenting him for his good listening and good behavior. Either I caught him on a good day or we just had a good mesh of styles… but when I left, he ran up and gave me a big hug goodbye.

I told you I kicked ass.

This article has 14 comments

  1. Tree

    LMAO on the poo / wormy costumes. I love that place. I have fond memories of it from when I was a child.

    WTG, Aimee & Declan!

  2. joansy

    You are a brave, brave woman.
    Ditto on the poo costumes.
    I’m glad it went well.

  3. mamalicious

    good job, ass kicker. some day i’ll teach you how to have “teacher voice.” it even scares some adults.

  4. Heather

    Congrats Aimee! Sounds like maybe the kid ends up being the scapegoat whether he is always the instigator or not. I am sure he’d love to see you at school again.

  5. Builder Mama

    Congrats on making it through! The poo/worm costumes were hilarious!

    I remember helping my college roommate (who was actually a REAL kindergarten teacher) her first year chaperone a trip to the pumpkin patch and of course I was put in charge of the Class Badass (who oddly enough looks like your little Badass). The kid was enough to make a saint curse, but we survived. And oddly enough, last week Kim emailed me to let me know that she’d found out that he is 20 now and has a kid. Egads, the Spawn of Badass!

    Declan is such a cool kid!

  6. MB

    Great job, Aim! To me the costumes looked like something else though….. 😉

  7. aimee

    um yeah… you can say it.. it’s OK… p-e-n-i-s 🙂

  8. TxGambit

    You Rock!

    And, um-yeah, I was thinking penis not poo or worm or hot dog…..

    I did a trip to the art museum. I had two “bad” kids. So ya know what they do have at the art museum. Yes, statues with penis on them. The boys just looooved that!

    What is wrong with me tonight? Mind in gutter….?

    Ah memories!

  9. Gretchen

    “you should have seen the look on his face when I kept complimenting him for his good listening and good behavior”

    That is awesome! I’m so glad it worked out!

  10. Bryan

    Awesome! Looked like they were having a blast! I still wonder why the children’s museum has poo costumes, though.

  11. Meghann

    LOL! Those costumes are the awesome.

    I found you through Christine’s blog. (meghann8 from Nov 02). Mind if i blogroll you?

  12. aimee

    Welcome Meghann! Sure, I’d love it! But, I can’t see your blog through your profile, no fair! 😉

    …and Gretchen, I know! I am a huge fan of positive reinforcement… and I know Dex’s teacher does that – and I even witnessed it when I was there yesterday… so I just don’t know what the whole story is with this kid is… 🙁

  13. Meghann

    Hrmm. Have no idea why it’s not showing up in my profile. That’s odd. Here ya go:
    http://3minionsintow.blogspot.com

    Come visit and make yourself at home!

  14. DTM

    I’m glad you had a good time and could rangle those kids together! Good Job! My take on those costumes is either they are really old pickled snitzels that forgot to be eaten or formaldehyded penis’s without the equipment.

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