Stop The Merry-Go-Round, I Want To Get Off

I had a crap day yesterday.

It started with the realization that we forgot to do Declan’s homework. Again. This is particularly crappy after I convinced Declan’s teacher to extend the homework deadline to Monday to help us working parents out. So us working parents can’t even get our shit together to do 4 worksheets of homework when we have a full week to do it. Awesome.

And then we have Declan working on it in the morning before school – building excellent study habits – and when I go out to check on him, instead of working on said homework, he is sitting on the floor, playing with the dog. After we have talked about that. Several times. Loudly.

Then work was a whirlwind of trying to get a myriad of shit done before the sub-PTA meeting being held at our house last night, the only highlight of the day being when my new iMac arrived, which of course, in the whirlwind, both Bryan and I forgot to bring this shiny new iMac home – so thus it sits… all lonely and encased in cardboard, at my office, in the dark.

And just as I was about to rush out the door to our PTA meeting, with many last minute items in hand, finished just in time for the PTA meeting (see where Declan gets it?), the phone rings. It is my endocrinologist, my diabetes doctor, with my recent lab results. I know things are not good when I can hear her screaming before I even get the handset to my ear. I hear my new HA1C number and go numb. It’s the highest it’s ever been, the first time I have ever even approached a danger zone, and NO WONDER I have been feeling like absolute shit lately. I sit back down feebly in my chair, on the verge of tears, and we discuss this new course of action… get off my ass and exercise more, check my blood sugars more, think about adding a new medication to the mix. That last one kills me. I have always prided myself on being mildly Type II diabetic. Mildly. If I take two medications, I certainly won’t be mildly Type II anymore, will I?

I kind of shuffle out of the office and down to my car, drive home in a daze and arrive at my house to see several people gathered on my lawn for the PTA meeting. Interesting.

I invite them in behind me to find a sweating Bryan trotting out of the house with a bag of trash. Apparently Poe, our dog with a very sensitive stomach of late, decided to have diarrhea all over the kitchen right before the meeting. All. over. the. kitchen.

Perfect.

Then on to the joy of PTA. Granted a sub-set of PTA for a specific event that I love, but still people talking over each other, politics, herding cats. Yadda yadda yadda.

And, then – POOF! They were gone. All except my friend Sarah, who is a saint and stayed to clean up the kitchen with Bryan.

This is when we realized Declan had not eaten a scrap of dinner. The hungry pathetic look he gave us was by far better than Antonio Banderas’ cat in Shrek. More awesome parent guilt. We ate. We chatted. It was 8:30. We started to relax. We noticed Declan’s hands and face were blue.

“What’s that blue on your hands, buddy?”

“Oh. I was drawing downstairs.”

This fact is important because when Bryan went to go close up the garage, he noticed that someone – guess who – had been into the spraypaint, and had sprayed it on several pieces of wood and toys in the garage.

Spraypaint, for the love of Pete.

This kid is 6 years old.

Yeah yeah yeah, kids are kids and they do stupid shit. In fact, I know my mom is going to call me up with a bunch of “remember whens” in about 5 minutes… but the big problem here is DO YOU REMEMBER SHARPIE NIGHT???

The funny thing is, in his warped little 6.5 year old mind, he did not understand how the two were related.

Aimee: “We are even more disappointed because you did this AGAIN after we have talked about it many, many times.”

Declan: “What do you mean? I have never played with spraypaint before.”

Aimee: “Did you steal sharpies from my desk?”

Declan: “Yes.”

Aimee: “Well, you stole spraypaint from Dad’s garage.”

Aimee: “Did you write with permanent Sharpies all over furniture and toys?”

Declan: “Yes.”

Aimee: “Well, you sprayed permanent paint on Dad’s wood and on toys in the garage.”

Aimee: “Did you lie about what you did with the Sharpies when you got caught?”

Declan: “Yes.”

Aimee: “Well, YOU LIED ABOUT THE SPRAYPAINT.”

Declan: “Oh.”

We haven’t decided yet what his punishment will be but I am really really really considering selling him on eBay.

Or at least renting.

This article has 22 comments

  1. Katja

    Sorry you had a crappy day, and sorry for the test results. I know exactly how it goes, I fear my doctor’s visits and seeing those numbers to pop in the digital screen and always hoping for the best, but fearing for the worst, and leaving the office in tears. (I don’t have diabetes, something else)

    I relate even more to the homework and the spray paint… We were trying to rent a house a month ago and the owner was joking that kids don’t draw on the walls anymore because they are so big, right.. and three kids say “we used to do it all the time, but not for a while”. Obviously, we didn’t rent my dream house.

  2. Banteringblonde

    Yikes, that is quite a day! I hate homework and think they should outlaw it, homework stresses me out! I found last Wed. assignment on the floor in my car yesterday… ugh Sharpies, nail polish, lipstick – my walls have seen them all. Do you suppose it is a sign of intelligence?

  3. Scout's Honor

    ugggh, it sounds like you are having the same type month I am having. Is it the air? Gah!

    Well, my issues are figuring our if I want a hysterectomy at 37, my sisters not talking to me after finding my blog,my dog having cancer, my husband having 2 heart conditions, high cholesterol and hand biopsies which resulted in his life insurance be canceled as our only income, my husband’s laptop was stolen which included social security, birth dates, address, credit card, passport, etc–hello identity theft and $3000 in loss and $1000 damage to car (Cha-ching!)and FINALLY the source of the most mommy stress, my 12 year old son is coping attitude and went from a’s to c’s.

    It’s in the air, I tell you.

    The hell with swine flu. There’s something evil this way comes. Heh!

    So my feeling, you just got to laugh about the dog sh*t and spray paint life gives you and drive on. I hope you have a great support system.

    Crossing my fingers and toes for you and me.

  4. zipper

    Is it bad that I laughed??

    Sorry about your bad day.

  5. Sizzle

    Dude, that IS a crappy day. Total CRAP!

    Hope things get better.

    xo

  6. Sue at nobaddays

    How about a kid swap for a week or so? … we have lots of almost-four attitude in our house these days, and since you’ve been through that, you could probably clean it up quick-quick.

  7. Dacia

    Hi! I enjoy reading your blog but have never left a comment before.

    I just wanted to throw in my two cents regarding Poe’s sensitive stomach. I have a 2-year-old Berner and he too has a sensitive tummy. It took us many MANY tries to find a dog food that didn’t give him diarrhea and that he would eat (he’s not a big eater). Finally we found the Blue Buffalo brand (http://www.bluebuff.com/) – it’s available at Petsmart. Our Berner likes it and it has never upset his stomach. So if it’s Poe’s food that is causing problems, I highly recommend this brand!

    I hope today is a better day for you!
    Dacia

  8. Mr Lady

    Remember Basquiat (sp?) and hug your budding genius. And then laugh. You can’t do much else.

    And I think it may be wrong that I miss those awful PTA meetings as much as I do. But I do. And I never even got to come to one at your house. 🙁

  9. Meghann

    It must be something in the air. Lindsay drew on the walls recently. I was like “wtf? You’re SIX. Why are you drawing on walls?!”

  10. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Today IS a better day, although I have been taking a close look at my blood sugars and they are WACK! I guess the 2nd med is coming my way, sigh.

    But thanks you all. You rock.

  11. Anonymous

    After your tweets yesterday about your bad day, had to check up on you. Sorry about Poe & Dex.

    Just another FYI about the Blue Buffalo: one of the bennies of BB is less poo. Yeah, less poo! Riley has about half the poo of another jack russell we know.

    As for Dex & the sharpies & spray paint: I wish I had something helpful to say. At least he didn’t get the car? (Gasoline will remove fresh paint from a car, in case you ever need that information.)

    I hope getting to the office this morning & opening your new puter made it all better.

    Sophia/Stone Leaf

  12. g-man

    Still you got a new iMac 😉

    I have been in the same homework spot before, realizing that for the third week in a row we didn’t do any for the kindergartener. Granted it is just underlining and circling words in a poem, but really, 3 weeks in a row, bad daddy.

    I do hope that you can get your sugar under control and feel better.

  13. NaysWay

    Oh wow. I wish I could say I have never had that happen to me, but my seven-year-old does the same thing. I swear she checks out right in front of your face. You can be yelling and screaming at her about the stupid thing she just did and watch her literally change the channels in her brain. I am daily living a Charlie Brown cartoon.

    Oh, and the last minute homework thing? So there with you.

  14. Lindy

    sorry about the crappy day but YAY for the new iMac!

  15. well read hostess

    We’re channeling each other.

    You are not alone!

  16. catnip

    I really hope you’re having a better day today!

  17. Hip Mom's Guide

    Wow, that IS a crappy day. Yikes.

    Thank goodness for the iMac. At least it wasn’t spray painted. 🙂

  18. Anonymous

    wowzers! Hope today is betterr!!!

  19. Rachael

    Oh no! Hope today was way better!

  20. Grey Street Girl

    Wow, what a crappy day…literally. 🙁 I hope your week gets better!

  21. Julie @ The Mom Slant

    You know I will go out biking or walking or swimming with you. Come over and bring your bike – we’ll hit the trail. Or I’ll come to you. I’m a good cheerleader and I won’t leave you in the dust. Promise.

    In the meantime, I’m going to double-check the hiding places of our Sharpies and spray paint.

  22. Nat

    God… I have had those days. The Man and I meet with the teachers every year and lay down some ground rules about homework. Basically, we are both working parents. Sometimes homework doesn’t get done. And no, it won’t get done over the weekend either. It’s up to them to prioritize…

    The way I see it, the verdict is out on homework as to whether it helps or hinders.

    As for Declan… man, I took The Boy’s Wii away for a week… (But yeah, I’d be pissed.)

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