Hecubus will swoop from the sky to save me!

Guess where I am off to today? Jury Duty!

Guess what I have got? A cold, my womanly crap, and 6,000,000 things to do at the office!


Bryan said last night that the judge better watch his ass, because it’s like the perfect storm of hell coming his way. Bryan can do a pretty good Ozzy impression when he wants to, so he starts singing about a devil woman taking over the courthouse in a fit of PMS and coughing.

Personally though, I prefer to think of myself as Simon Mulligan from Kids in the Hall.

I’m evil, evil, evil! Pick me for a juror and go to hell!

Sir Simon Mulligan & Hecubus

This article has 15 comments

  1. Heather

    Wow, I hope you get put on the jury of someone who did something really, really evil–they deserve you 🙂

  2. joansy

    I am so, so, so jealous.

  3. Tree

    I hope you feel better and are not selected!

  4. aimee / greeblemonkey

    …. I WAS EXCUSED! No need for me today after I sat in the FREEZING jury waiting room all morning. WOO HOO!

    Tomorrow I will tell the story of the last time I sat on a jury. It ain’t pretty.

  5. Amber

    one of the benefits of being an illegal alien. Oh wait. Did I say illegal?…

  6. Nat

    I wonder if you were to say loudly to the “peers” with you… “Screw the evidence, let’s find the guy/gal guilty and move on.” If they let you off the hook?

  7. Melissa

    Logic defies how they pick jurors. You should cry, cough and wheeze all over everyone and hope that they are A)Grossed out, B)Sympathetic or C)determine that they don’t want the crazy sick lady on their jury (my personal fave).

    The one time I was called for duty I was not picked. It was a domestic abuse case. However, the one guy that admitted to being CONVICTED of domestic abuse a few year prior(against his then-girlfriend) was chosen.

    I went home by Noon. And it was the best afternoon playing hooky, ever.

  8. samantha jo campen

    All, the justice system won’t know what hit ’em.

    Good luck!

  9. aimee / greeblemonkey

    Allison, trust me – I totally believe in sitting on a jury (and voting!), I am just really not fond of the way Denver does it. Today proved what a complete waste their system is. 200 people sitting in a room for hours to be sent home, to serve on *no* jury.

    Wait till you hear my story tomorrow. I have definitely done some heavy-duty jury time.

    And welcome Loralee, glad you enjoy my use of the word boobs. The funny things is, AMBER STARTED IT! I actually dislike the word boobs a whole lot, LOL.

  10. aimee / greeblemonkey

    P.S. HOWEVER! “Pontificating” is one of my favorite words.

  11. Catherine

    ooh, can’t wait for tomorrow’s story! And most definitely hope the the cold and womanly crap issues subside a little. If nothing else, maybe the 6,000,000 things will magically whittle down to 5,435,345. You get my point. 🙂

  12. Loralee Choate

    Hey! Surfed in from Crazy Canuk’s. (I just had to. Anyone who can say “Boobs” that many times in a comment deserves a visit!)

    I am the biggest dork. I DREAM of serving on a jury. I’ve been called three times, but each time it’s a no-go. :S

    I am totally, completely, and in all other ways, a jealous hater at this moment.

  13. Loralee Choate

    Oh, drat. Maybe I should read all the comments before pontificating. Sigh.

    It sucks that you were there all day for nothing.

  14. soccer mom in denial

    I adore you. I really really do. I just wish folks wouldn’t speak ill of doing the things we need to do to be a part of a democratic society. Like sitting in a jury. Or voting.

    I know if I was being tried I would want someone articulate, well-read and thoughtful – like you – judging me. Even if it was that time of the month.

  15. Nadine

    Wow! I wish we had a legal system like yours. There have been votes on changing the system to one with juries, but somehow it never gets through. I can’t wait to here the rest of your story!

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