Yo, Julie! Surprise!!!

Mayberry Mom and Motherhood Uncensored have cooked up an online baby shower for the Mothergoosemouse herself! (P.S. Come one, come all, and join in!) We’re supposed to write a post, offering advice about raising boys – since the two adorable moppets Julie currently has are definitely among the girl variety.

But Julie herself knows I hate when things get sectioned off into “boy things” vs. “girl things,” so this is hard!

One thing I know for sure is girl clothes are WAY cuter. The Children’s Place is your friend.

Which I guess brings me back round to the “boy things” vs. “girl things.”

We were out with a friend who has an older girl and a younger boy this weekend. The older girl got a toy at the gift shop – a unicorn with pink wings and a long flowing tail. My friend was kind enough to buy Declan a black pony, which he loved, but I was fully expecting him to want the unicorn with pink wings and a long flowing tail, because that’s what his friend got and most of Declan’s friends are girls and that’s what he knows. But surprisingly, he loved his black pony. When it was the younger brother’s turn, guess what he wanted? The unicorn with pink wings and a long flowing tail! We showed him some alternatives, but he wanted it – certainly because that’s what his sister had. But my friend never once said “that’s a girls toy.” She finally relented and told him they would have to write his name on his, to tell them apart. The older sister started to protest, started to use the “g-toy” word, and their mom hushed her and said, “He gets to choose what he wants.”

But you know this, Julie. You and I have talked about it. But I guess my main point is, how surprised I was with the pressure to separate boy from girl in so many different ways – and that it comes at you from many different angles. And sure, I assume you get this as a parent of a girl, too – but as a parent of a boy, it feels different. Girls have time to be weak, have time to be silly, have time to explore every little fantasy. Boys feel rushed into little manhood.

But, in truth, this post isn’t about giving you advice, Julie. Because the mom in this photo already knows all this. The mom in this photo listens to her kids and helps them through the pitfalls of childhood with good sense and good humor.

So. Many warm congratulations to you, Kyle, Tacy and CJ for the expected arrival of the latest (and last!?) Babygoosemouse. Let me know when he is ready for portraits.

P.S. Put a diaper over his you-know-what while changing him. You’ll thank me later.

This article has 25 comments

  1. lauren

    lovely post.

  2. Mayberry

    You’re so smart. I totally went for the pee advice.

    Beautiful post and gorgeous picture too.

  3. monstergirlee

    I am constantly reminding my 5 yr old that its not a boy toy or girl toy, they’re just toys and its a baby toy or whatever. His daycare is kind of that way – not as “progressive” as we are. Not to worry, they are progressive in other ways and thats very cool.
    No advice tho. I have one of each and I am really so thankful for each of my kidlets. I never ever thought I’d get a girl, but I did! Yay.
    My kids are really different, but I’m not sure how much is gender and how much is personality.


  4. Anonymous

    What a fun idea! Congrats to Mothergoosemouse!

  5. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Merry… I can’t tell you how much I loved Srawberry Shortcake. I an tempted to get them for Declan now just so I can play with them again. 😉

  6. J at www.jellyjules.com

    We have some friends who have two young boys. When the first was maybe 3 months old, they went to a party in a park with a bunch of friends and family. The weather turned a bit chilly, and they had forgotten to bring a blanket. A friend with a baby girl offered her extra, which was pink. When the father covered his chilly son with a cozy pink blanket, one of the family members blurted out, in horror, “You can’t put a pink blanket on him, you’ll turn him gay!”

    Without batting an eyelash, the father replied, “That’s OK, we’re raising him gay.” HA!

  7. mothergoosemouse

    Hear hear.

    One of the many, many reasons I love Kyle is that he will not care one whit whether his son carries a purse or a gun. And with two older sisters, it’s only a matter of time before they start putting pink and purple clippies in his hair.

    Thank you, my friend, for the encouragement. You know I’ll be looking to you for more, especially considering how much we think of your big boy!

  8. Catherine

    Awww. This was such a sweet tribute to a wonderful mother.

    I’m off to contribute a post as well.

  9. anastasia beaverhausen

    Yes, Amy. I totally agree. Separating stuff into “boy things” and “girl things” doesn’t take into account the individuality that is the human being…regardless of gender. That said, I tried to address the malecentric behaviors that I’ve discovered by raising my sons. Come by for a visit!

  10. merrymishaps

    I still make fun of my brother for having a Strawberry Shortcake doll. Sure, it was the Purple Pie Man, and he was two or three … but still …

    That said, I try to stay somewhat gender neutral when shopping for our young cousins!

  11. monstergirlee (again)

    OH I thought of something.
    The last thing you do before securing his diaper is point his penis “down”. Everything will be dryer, trust me.

  12. zipper

    nice post. congrats to Julie.

  13. Heather

    So true! My daughter has just as many cars and trucks as her brother. And he is just as likely (sometimes more so) to dress in a frilly pink dress for dress-up.

  14. mamacheryl

    My brother was horrified when his wife bought their son a mini-kitchen set when he was three. He’s since gotten over it. Thank goodness.

  15. Mama Drama Jenny, the Bloggess

    Beautiful. Simply beautiful.

  16. Queeny

    My two boys are sweet and considerate, yet also selfish and overindulgent at the same time. Still, my girl is proving to be the more challenging child — headstrong and pushy.

    My (unsolicited) advice: take each day and each personality as it comes.

    Mothergoosemom apparently has a great bunch of gal pals to rely on.

  17. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Thanks all 🙂 …and did you notice the bee buzzing in the photo? That bee was all up in our dinner just a minute before.

  18. Aimee Greeblemonkey

    Oh, and AlphaDogma, I only turned on comments about a year into blogging. I was shy. 😉

  19. carrie

    . . . and duct tape around his diaper when you lay him down for a nap.

    The little boy part has a way of “aiming” itself just so to make sure each and every pair of footy pj’s will be wet at bedtime.

    What a beautiful post for an awesome momma!

  20. missy wiggins

    i have two boys and one girl and honestly they share toys. my daughter doesn’t see any difference in her dolls and her older brother’s toy cars. she wants everything! when i had my daughter there was a strict NO PINK policy but now she likes the color and i HAVE to buy it. you just never know…

  21. Alpha DogMa

    I freakin’ loving you. The boy vs. girl thing drives me nuts. For the longest time my younger boy had issues with colour recognition. The only colours he could consistently discern and label were pink and purple. So we own toys of all colours and all genders — to the annoyance of some or our OLD relations.

    The only advice I offer is start toughening up the soles of your feet: you’ll be stepping on lego blocks for the next decade. And they hurt like a bitch.

    Loved your P&P post. Why were there no comments allowed? I love both versions, for different reasons.

  22. Cobwebs

    Heh. That last sentence is probably the single best piece of advice you can give the parents of a boy.

    There’s an upside to that, though; you don’t technically *have* to find a public restroom in case of emergency.

  23. AB

    This post is so similar to the thoughts I had about girls getting to do-pick-choose *whatever* they want, whether it’s girlish or boyish, but boys being limited to stuff that is *appropriate* for boys. At the very least they get funny looks at picking something girlish and pressure that they can’t/shouldn’t have it because it is for girls.

    You can see my post on this here

  24. Anonymous

    Great post.

  25. Deirdre

    Just discovered your site via Blue Yonder, and this post struck a chord.

    Have you heard Dar Williams’ song, “When I was a Boy”? Not that I know you well enough to order you around, but you must go listen to it right now.

    I’m raising two little boys, and am shocked at how many messages my oldest (5) receives now that he’s in school about what is “okay” for boys vs girls.

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